Monday, July 5, 2010

Stupidity Overhead In The Office & Out In Public

Man, it's been a while since I've posted anything. I haven't felt real motivated lately (obviously) but I do have something today.

Several weeks ago while at work, I overheard a conversation that grabbed my attention and made me go, WTF???  Names have been changed to protect the dumb.

Neggy was sitting at her desk. I thought she was working. All of a sudden, she starts sniffing the air like a dog and announces, "My computer smells!"

No, wait, it gets dumber. Really.

So Neggy starts shifting around in her desk, messing with her computer, still sniffing and keeps announcing, "My computer smells! I think it's coming from the tower. It smells damp!" She actually gets up from her desk, walks away from it and continues to sniff. "Why does my computer smell?" This goes on for a few more minutes. I've turned around in my chair so Neggy can't see me rolling my eyes. How the hell can a CPU SMELL damp and still function? Nothing was wet or damp around her. I'm starting to think she's a crackhead.

All of a sudden, Neggy goes back to her desk and sniffs her work area again. "Oh, I don't think it's my computer," she announces. "I think it's the fabric softener I use. I think its my pants that smell!"

Yeah, she just announced at work in front of a bunch of people that her PANTS SMELL.

Very calmly, like it's nothing, Push-Over asks her, without taking her eyes off her own computer, "Do you want to borrow my Febreeze? I keep a bottle of it under my desk." After this, Neggy was happy and sprayed her pants all over with Febreeze to cover up whatever smell she thought was coming from her fabric softener. (What kind of fabric softener is she using that it apparently reeks?)

The reason I thought about this was because of something I overheard last night. We had gone down to Greenie's to meet some friends down there and sit on the deck overlooking the Chesapeake Bay to watch fireworks.

The fireworks were being fired off on Ocean View beach, about 2-3 blocks from Greenies. That white condo building in the photo to the left, to the right of the fireworks, was just about where they were being fired from. Remember this...we were watching fireworks on the Fourth of July in a heavily populated military community, on the beach, from about 2-3 blocks away. Pretty cut and dried, right?

The fireworks started after 9 PM and it was a pretty good display.

Someone in our group had purchased a small American flag to wave. It was made of plastic and probably 8"x12" in size on a plastic pole about 24" long.

As the fireworks were going off, someone on the other side of the deck at Greenies actually yelled at her, "Put the flag down, I can't see the fireworks!"

Okay, so you're outside and you can't see the fireworks around a flag that's 8"x12" in size? Alright, Buzz Kill. So she hands the flag off to another friend who yells, "These colors don't run!" He waves OUR NATION'S FLAG ON THE ANNIVERSARY OF IT'S BIRTH. He's not being obnoxious. And once again, the douche bag from the other side of the deck yells, "I said to put the damn flag down, I CAN'T SEE THE FIREWORKS!"

At this point, they just decided to let the big baby have his way and not start anything with him, but we were all pretty much amazed by the guts of that man to complain about an American flag being waved ON THE FOURTH OF JULY.

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